No Kings

let me remind you
that it was you
who said you were sorry first.
and had you not apologized
I wouldn't of jumped off the fence
in the first place.
It's just
I know you
and when you apologize
it's never good.
and when you ask me for my forgivness
I know it's going to hurt
the words that come next.
and that's why I jumped.
I didn't want to know why
or what you had figured out
and I had no more energy
to figure out my next move
and I just wanted to feel the wind in my hair
for a few seconds
before things started to hurt
because lying here
I at least know why it happened
And I don't have to wonder anymore
I don't have to put anything back together
With luck I won't have to worry about getting help
anymore.
It's my pain
and I saw it start
or at least saw it coming
with my eyes open
I took control
But if I must
I apologize.